Happy Thanksgiving 

I hope you are all having a great holiday weekend spent just the way you’d like. I’m taking some down time. I’ve relaxed more this weekend than I have in months, and it feels great!
We had our traditional Thanksgiving feast on Vashon Island this year, but it felt unlike any other Thanksgiving in my life. Last year, just one year ago, I was recovering from a chemo treatment, being tough and hanging in there to get through Thanksgiving. Thankful, of course for my family and support, but looking back…I was sick, really sick. The chemo was just awful.
Right now I’m pretty healthy. I’m taking heart meds for the damage the chemo did to my heart, but for the most part, I am healthy. Knock on wood…I’ve fought off all the little bugs the little buggers have thrown my way…knock on wood…not even a bad cold. Knock on wood! I’m staying strong!
Prior to the scan, I can now say, I was freaking out. The stress was unbelievable. I did not realize that the stress was primarily from the anticipation of the scan and the results. I was putting all the blame for the stress on my job. Don’t get me wrong; my job is too much work and a lot of stress, but after the release and the good news following the scan…my job stress seems quite manageable. And that is just what I am doing, at least trying to do, managing my stress.
Last week, the 3 days prior to Thanksgiving, I met with the parent or parents of each of my 26 students. It was a good deal of work to prepare and be up for each and every one of them, but it is always good to sit and talk and so very informative. Now I have 3 weeks until the winter holiday break. I have some new programs to implement between now and then, but my goal is to make this job more manageable so I don’t damage myself anymore with unnecessary stress. Yikes! It’s really just not very good for you.
This coming Tuesday I have an appointment with Dr. Standish, my naturopath for my first infusion. Honestly, I can’t remember exactly what I am getting infused with! I know there is Vitamin C, but there is one other thing and I’m not sure what it is…I’ll let you know. What I know is that it should help me feel stronger/healthier and is supposed to help keep the cancer from recurring. I’m all for that!I’m going to try it at least 2-3 times and see how I feel. It’s not cheap and is not covered by insurance, but between now and the end of the year it is what we’ll spend our remaining flex plan money on, so it works out pretty well for us.
People ask me if I “knew” the cancer was gone or if I’d hoped for this much. I don’t think I had the audacity to hope for this much. There was just too much at stake. What a serious disappointment it would have been; that would have just been a trench too deep to fall into if I’d hope for a clean scan. There is a fine line, a tight balance I had to walk between hope and fear. I guess I still walk it, if I stop to think about it. But mostly we are celebrating and living with this good news!
I’m appreciating this less dramatic lifestyle. No highs and lows of chemo and bad colds, high anxiety and cancer. I continue to cry, sometimes daily for a variety of reasons; mostly relief and gratitude, but anxiety and fear creep in now and then.
Wish me luck as I work on what so many of us work on, balancing life and work and managing stress. It’s a lifelong battle, is it not? I wish us all luck in that department. Breathe in, Breathe out!

Happy Sunday

With Love Janet

Celebrations!
Blessings!
Miracles!
There was no cancer on my scan. No cancer.
The site of the ablation is still angry and inflamed (though my liver numbers were happier than they've been in a year...meaning less inflammation) and there is a "spot" a "mark" a "bit" adjacent to the ablation site, which may just be more ablation site but the scan reader guy can't really tell for sure.
So, the plan is a PET scan in January and until then I have to make my job manageable if I want to keep working full time.

Now with this weight and stress lifted I will get through parent conferences then make my job manageable.

Blessings out to you all. Thanks for your part of my healing!
love to you all
Janet

Hello all,

No news is good news and I’ve had no news, or more precisely no time for news.

Here is a bullet point blog update:

*work work work work… I am working way too many hours each week. It’s not humane or sane. I am not complaining (not right now, mind you…I do complain plenty often!) I’m just stating facts. I am working too many hours. After conferences (the week of Thanksgiving) things should chill a bit and I am going to make myself work fewer hours. I remember last year saying I missed complaining about my job...well I get to do that again!! I've been officially full time since October 12, though Hillary has filled in for me a few times since then for appointments and professional development days. 

*My students are tricky, this is NOT an easy group. They are adorable and make me laugh out loud, but this is not an easy group of 26 first graders. I am working my ass off every day to stay positive and try to keep them focused and learning.

*I saw Dr. Mignone, and things are about the same with my heart. Healing heart failure is a long slow slog, that is what I have learned.

*I do a good hard cardio workout every Saturday and Sunday and then try to get in one more during the week. Mike and I are going to yoga on Monday nights and I have pilates class on Thursday. This is my other job…staying healthy so I can be prepared for what comes my way!

*The kids are great, both enjoying their jobs at APL, working hard and loving their students. They both have second jobs to make ends meet. Michael has started the process of applying for a job as a fire fighter. Maggie has applied for graduate programs at UW, Vanderbilt and maybe other spots; Early Childhood Special Education. Hmmm, that sounds familiar! Oh, right, that is what I did!

*Mike’s school year started off just as busy as it ended in June…too many high needs kids in the school district and not enough special programs for them all. It is frustrating, but important work. He is downstairs right now working on his lathe which is what he LOVES to do.

*Tuesday night is the Stomach Cancer Awareness Fundraiser I mentioned before. Here is a link if you are interested and able to come join us:

http://evite.me/Y9wxKMY29v

if the link does not work, contact me and I’ll get you the information

*Thursday is my scan. My school district dropped my insurance company as an option so starting Nov. 1, so I am on a new plan. That is always a scary thing; I’m not positive about the coverage until they start covering things. So, I’m not 100% certain they will cover a PET scan at this point, which is what the doctor has ordered. I’ll find out sometime this week, but it just adds an extra dose of anxiety to a highly anxious event.

So that is where we are, how we are, this rainy, rainy weekend prior to my scan.

I look forward to seeing some of you on Tuesday night and I'll let you know what we find out after our scan. We should find out the results late Thursday afternoon. Sending my love to you all and asking for all your positive energy, prayers and white lights. 

Stay warm and cozy!

Love,

Janet