Chutes and ladders..
I just went down the big fat slide in the chutes and ladders version of gut healing...had to take lomotil...back to clear liquids :-(
No chance for a Wednesday exit....Thursday would be a reach I think...my eyes are on Friday!!
Think healing thoughts and think Friday!
Xoxoxox to you all

Seduced by grilled cheese...
And damn, I have to talk about poo again...

I know that wheat bloats me and as I was able to reintroduce food I had said to myself, I'll just lay off wheat! No brainier! Then yesterday, gray, rainy, 3 week anniversary of my hospital admit date...well let's just say I lost my mind and ordered grilled cheese. Here's what the menu says "comforting grilled cheese...cheddar cheese on white bread grilled to golden melted perfection."  How could I resist?? And white bread isn't really wheat...right? Damn....

All afternoon, evening and night I was bloaty and gassy then my poo just kept getting a little less formed, not all the way back to the  D word, but not good. So today is a do over for yesterday. I hope I didn't move my exit date but my guess is it won't be tomorrow, so hopefully Thursday, and if it is Friday, well so be it. I have to be a patient patient!

So here I am, taking it easy on my gut, rebuilding and healing.
I am getting some exercise in though nearly everyday, walking laps around the floor, working on a spin bike at the end of my hall, doing some of my Pilates and some of my PT work with bands. I turned to jello those first 2 weeks and I have to build some muscle back!

Headed home soon...I'll keep you posted! Love to you all!
Janet

Good day to you all!
The progress continues! Today I'm eating food...real food!!! I had some scrambled eggs for breakfast and grilled cheese and chicken noodle soup for lunch...like a real person.
This implies (and this will be my last poo report) that I am going real poo! Enough said!!!

So now it is a matter of time. They halved my "feed bag", and I'm completely off anti-D meds! I only took a .5 whatever of Ativan at bed time, no other meds at all (I'll miss you tincture of opium!!).
I asked the doc when I might go home and he said Wednesday or Thursday!!! Today is exactly the three week mark, so I really am more than ready to head out and all the way back to west seattle!

My sister Kathy is planning to come up from Boulder for a few days, at least, to help us out at home. Mike and Maggie can continue to work and I'll have a keeper to make sure I do not over do it, and we'll a grand time as well! I'm looking forward to hanging out with her, for sure!

On the cancer front, Dr. Kaplan said today that we'll do nothing this week. Any scan I would take would require a nasty beverage or dye that would give me, guess what?  Yep, diarrhea. So no talk of cancer this week. I imagine next week or very soon we'll have to find out what is going on in there. I was convinced for a while that the chemo was definitely still at work, but now, I have no idea what is going on in there, and we'll just have to wait and see. Roz has kept the butterflies on the job, and I'm open to all your prayers in any form you might offer them, thanks!

This weekend was awesome and exhausting!! Thanks to all my visitors, it was so great to see you and get caught up! But it did wear me out! Last night after I booted the family out I just sat in my chair here for a few minutes with my head in my hands...my nurse Kate came in and was worried to see me like that...no, I'm great!! Just happily tired! So,thank you all, that will carry me far!
Love to you all, see you soon in west seattle!
Janet

Good Sunday morning!
Lots of progress here, I'm so happy to report!
I've had no "D" since Thursday and on Friday I had a small actual formed piece of poo!! So sorry to have to give you poo details...but that is really what it has come down to!
Dr. Goodman is the doc of the weekend, yesterday he put me on clear liquids, I said I was too scared, but he said to go for it. So yesterday I had 4 bowls of broth and a number of gummy bears!
This morning he came in again and upped me to full liquid. This adds milk products, which I'm going to avoid for now, but I can try yogurt again. I'm going to have cream of rice for breakfast and tomato soup for lunch because I do need to advance my diet to get out of here! So, wish me luck that the food goes in and does what food is supposed to do! Handling food intake and output correctly is my ticket out of here!

I had such a great day yesterday with so many visitors!! Oh my, it felt a little like one of our old parties where so many different parts of our lives come together! Thank you all for making my day! I thoroughly enjoyed it!

Happy Sunday everyone! Thanks for all your prayers, thoughts, positive energy and love! It's working!! Love to you all!
Janet

Good morning!
I'm acutely aware that as I lay here there are several angels getting ready to clean my house. First of all, thank you, thank you, thank you. But, you all know that I am a bit of a control freak, so,this is really freaking me out!! Cancer is one hard core teacher and letting go is one of the lessons. All I really want to do is apologize to all of you in my house for any clutter and extra work you find but I'll try to let it go and just thank you, thank you, thank you!!! We appreciate any thing you get to and please don't worry about anything that does not get done. Extra thanks to Gillian for organizing this...good luck over there!!

Update...I'm feeling pretty good. I've had an extra fabulous nurse the last couple of evenings/nights and she has helped work my anti-D and sleep meds to be more effective. I'm only taking lomotil a few times a day, taking Ativan by IV for sleep so no ambian to potentially upset my gut. And then starting last night at 4:00am she gave me the tincture of opium which is a strong anti-D med. Now, so far today, no D!!!! She and I were very excited that we might have come upon the right schedule and combo so my gut can finally heal completely!  Hope.....

This morning early Dr. Kaplan came in, likes the progress and has put me down for 3 more days of the same. So, I plan to be here all weekend with no food to finish healing this poor sad gut of mine. He talked about a potential scan early next week to check and see how the cancer cells have been doing during this time of healing. So, I have a long weekend ahead of me! I'm open for visitors. We can't have flowers up here and I can't eat so you can just drop in for a few minutes to say hey....that would be great! Hope to see some of you!

So happy Friday everyone! Have one for me, moonshine committee, I'll be thinking of you!
Love to you all
Janet

I'm still here! I can't believe I'm still in the hospital....but alas, here I am. It's still a bit of a puzzle what is going on here; they are not completely sure what or why this happened with my guts. They could not find any bugs or disease, it is kind of by default that it is a side effect of the chemo, but that is really what makes the most sense to us. Yesterday morning the doctor said he still wasn't convinced, but the fact is, here I am.

I feel fine, no pain, no cramping, so that is the good news.  The bad news is without medication I just can't stop having diarrhea. It's not a lot, it is actually just small amounts, but there it is. 

I don't really remember my first week here, I was very ill and out of it. I'm not actually even sure when I started to come around, but at that point I definitely had cramping and pain and lots of  pooping. Now there is no pain, no cramping, just bits of the D word. Two days ago they took me off food and it seems to have been the right move. I was not eating much, actually just small amounts of very healthy food, but it seems no food was the right way to go. I'm improving but it is definitely up and down, still. I think a few more days with no food will really start to let my guts heal. 

That is where we are now....kind of a waiting game at this point. Don't eat...heal the gut...be patient. But 18 days in the hospital (and still counting)...we did not predict this!

I cannot thank you all enough for the support you have given to our family to get through this turn in the road. It has thrown us for a loop and so many of you have been here in so many ways to help catch us and not let us fall. I'm so grateful for you all.

And if I can figure out how to post this from my ipad at the hospital then you all know I'm making some kind of progress!!

Love to you all from the 12 floor!

The chalkboard wall is updated and ready for Janet's return home. It still won't be for a couple of days, but she is getting better by the minute.  Everything is still running right through her, but the steroids seem to be working because she definitely feels better. Hope everyone is having a lovely weekend so far.